Today was a very emotional day for me. So of course I decided to binge. One day I'll keep my huge ass mouth shut. My husband and I fought again today. Oh my god, it drained me. I wish I could just leave. But I know I never will. If he could just keep his eyes away from every other woman, I would be happy. But who blames him? I'm horribly fat. I wouldn't want to look at me either. I used to think about suicide, but now that I have my son, I would never contemplate it again. He is the reason I live through each day. My depression is getting worse. I can feel it in my chest now. And I have anxiety attacks every so often. Today, just sucks. Sorry I'm being so negative. I'm just glad I can get it out of my mind, to kind of ease the pain. Because sometimes the pain is so unbarable, I have to do something about it or I'll burst. I hope all is well with you girls. I hope you're all happy. I'm going to go to sleep. Night girls, think skinny.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
*Yawn*
Today was a very emotional day for me. So of course I decided to binge. One day I'll keep my huge ass mouth shut. My husband and I fought again today. Oh my god, it drained me. I wish I could just leave. But I know I never will. If he could just keep his eyes away from every other woman, I would be happy. But who blames him? I'm horribly fat. I wouldn't want to look at me either. I used to think about suicide, but now that I have my son, I would never contemplate it again. He is the reason I live through each day. My depression is getting worse. I can feel it in my chest now. And I have anxiety attacks every so often. Today, just sucks. Sorry I'm being so negative. I'm just glad I can get it out of my mind, to kind of ease the pain. Because sometimes the pain is so unbarable, I have to do something about it or I'll burst. I hope all is well with you girls. I hope you're all happy. I'm going to go to sleep. Night girls, think skinny.
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What did you fight about? I feel very resentful in my marriage sometimes. I wish arguing with my husband didn't bother me so much as it barely seems to phase him which worsens my mood. Lets both try not to binge when we are emotionally triggered. Maybe try taking a walk or doing something productive like chores instead. We can change :)
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