Monday, February 14, 2011

Not Sure...

 That's just it. I'm not sure. Not sure what to do with myself anymore. I'm sick of fighting everything. I'm fighting my husband, my weight, my depression. I'm sick of it. I just want to be. Just be. I wish I didn't have emotions, or body fat for that matter. Seriously, the only think keepng me from not burrying myself 6 feet under is my son. He seriously is THE ONLY reason. And that makes me sad that my life has amounted to this much hate. I hate my husband, myself, my job. Who is this woman I became? I don't know myself, nor do I like myself. And I'm sad. I'm just sad. I fasted 2 days instead of 3. Proud I made it 2days? Me too. But the third day I had to eat, my whole family was over my new home. *Sigh* Oh well. The 2nd day actually wasn't too bad. The first was hell. Hunger pangs suuuuck. Anyways, I got alot to catch up on. I'll blog later.

2 comments:

  1. Two days is still a huge accomplishment, and I'm sure your husband only wants what's best for you. Everyone has moments like this, but we've just got to look ahead and fight our way through them, I hope you start feeling better soon xx

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  2. Congratulations on the two days. That is a great result anyway. And if you want to, we could make a three day fast together, when you feel up to it :)
    And that thinspo picture is lovely. I always find myself looking at Suicide Girl pictures.

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